Chapter 11: In Which Belle Becomes an Epic Detective

Hey, readers! I'm so sorry about the wait! Thank you so much for patiently waiting. I had a ton of homework this weekend, and grades are more important than "Once Upon a Time," so...

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I'm kind of like Hermione before people forgot that she was "The Annoying One" in the group. Anyways, now that we've established my well-known zealotry regarding my academic studies, on to the recap and review of this week's episode of ABC's fabulous "Once Upon a Time," 2x11: "The Outsider!"

What Happened

Fairytale Land (Past) :

• Last season, after Belle ditched Rumpelstiltskin's tower because he had intimacy issues and was unwilling to try the latest form of acne treatment, she gave Grumpy (known at the time as Dreamy, before said dreams were tragically crushed) some romantic advice. This takes place the day afterwards, when Belle is being adorkable in the same medieval tavern/pub/social scene, reading a book in a corner and planning out the next great Fairytale Landian Novel. 
• Grumpy/Dreamy shows up and encourages her to go on an adventure (the purpose of which is to hunt down a demon called a Yaoguai, which has been terrorizing the nearby towns) with some sketchy-looking guys in the corner who've decided it's a good idea to bring back the Tri-Cornered hat. 

I hear it's all the rage in Europe.

• Belle then gets the experience that any poor soul who has ever tried to read a book in a public place during their adolescence has been forced to undergo when one of her fellow adventurers asks her what she's reading. 

Traveling Companion:

Belle:

• The traveling companion continues to be obnoxious. Belle gets her smart-hat on and tells the dude (who just can't take "leave me the chocolate fudgicle alone" for an answer) that the Yaoguai lives near lakes. The jerk kicks Belle off the cart that he and his pals were riding, but Belle picks herself up and earns a "You go, girl," from the audience when she reveals that the Yaoguai actually like to hang out near mountains, not lakes. 
• At the mountain, Belle finds the Yaoguai, which looks like a magical fiery lion, but it attacks her! Just when our intrepid investigator is about to be irreversibly ingested, Mulan shows up and saves her. She's quite and reasonably irked with Belle, given that she'd apparently been tracking the Yaoguai for weeks. I guess she and Shang got divorced...?
• Later, Belle is being bullied in town by the same Traveling Companion as before. Mulan saves her again, reminding us viewers that the female characters on this show are not only the coolest and most epic but by far the most competent. 
• The two women team up, Mulan deciding to cut Belle some slack since Belle can decipher a book that has information about the Yaoguai within. When they arrive near the Yaoguai, Mulan's leg wound flares up (she got it from the bullies apparently, I missed that part when I was staring forlornly at the fridge trying to decide between blueberries or coffee ice cream) and Belle is left to go and beat the Yaoguai alone. 

Yaogaui:

• Belle invents irrigation and drenches the Yaogaui, which then turns back into its true self: Prince Philip! He'd been cursed by Maleficent, but now he's free! Belle introduces him to his one true love new best friend Mulan. Since she's having an excellent night, she bids them goodnight and leaves to go and give Rumpelstiltskin a second chance!

How Belle Feels:

• Then, just in case you were feeling happy, Regina shows up and captures Belle to bring her to the tower. 

How Belle Feels Now:

How the Audience Feels:

Storybrooke:

• After Rumpelstiltskin successfully pulls off an experiment (with Smee as the unwilling guinea pig), everybody else has a funeral for Archie. It's hard to feel sad, because A) we all know he's not really dead and B) I never really liked him that much. (Neither did Gepetto's parents, come and join our club.)
• Rumpelstiltskin explains to Belle that he's created a magic potion that allows him to cross the town line without losing his memory: he just has to put the potion on his most precious object and carry it with him (in order to find his son Baelfire).  For him, this means his wife Meela's shawl. As for me...

...well, he never does quite explain how one would pour magical potion onto paper without ruining it.

• On board the ship, Hook interrogates the still-alive Archie, but doesn't get any information out of him. So, naturally, Hook skips off to the library and tries to nab Belle. He fails, due to Rumpelstiltskin's timely intervention (my, Belle's a bit of a damsel this episode). Belle and Rumpel head back to his shop, which is a wreck-- apparently Hook used Belle as a distraction so he could go and shoplift an Everlasting Gobstobber steal the magical shawl. 
• If you've seen one Rumbelle conversation, you've seen them all. Rumpelstiltskin tells Belle she doesn't understand him and his reasoning  she tells him she wants to, and it goes on for five minutes. Eventually, it's decided that Belle will stay behind while Rumpelstiltskin goes to get the supernatural shawl back. 

• Meanwhile, in a household where passive-aggressive behaviors have yet to win over conversation and the sharing of emotions and ideas, Henry is heartbroken over Archie's supposed death. To deal with the grief, he is listening to Archie's voicemail over and over again. 

• Grumpy interrupts the grief (I guess the Royal Family's place is just sort of the hangout for everybody) by expressing an interest in returning to the Fairytale Land. Snow instantly rejects this, because Downton Abbey Season 3 has just started airing in America and the Fairytale Land lacks even the public channels. Grumpy, Ruby, and the rest of the dwarves point out that humans may very well start wandering into Storybrooke accidentally, and that while human fairytale characters such as Snow and David might be accepted with open arms, your everyday citizen is likely going to be far less tolerant of someone who can turn into a wolf or is born out of an egg fully grown as an adult. 
• We are then whisked away from what would have been a wonderfully interesting debate to see Belle discovering the invisible ship, she's just that good.

(Oh, and Rumpelstiltskin turns Smee into a rat. Apart from all the Pettigrew jokes we now get to make, nobody cares.)

• Belle frees Archie and sends him off to go get help while she investigates the ship, leading to the Horror Movie part of the episode, in which Hook shows up, alludes to Rumpelstiltskin murdering Meela (to which Belle responds with a "meh"), and begins chasing our heroine around the ship. 
• Rumpelstiltskin appears and fights Hook, then begins beating him up. Belle manages to talk him down, but only after Rumpel  reveals some very vengeful and homicidal tendencies still floating around in that magical noggin of his.

Rumpelstiltskin's Not-So-Diplomatic Solution to the Hook Problem:

Banishment. It's where it's at. 

• While all of this exciting detective/horror/soap opera drama is happening down at the docks, more was occurring back in the town. Snow tries to get David to see that they can buy a house in Storybrooke and live a peaceful life watching Maggie Smith be Maggie Smith in British costume dramas. David is not secure enough in his masculinity to watch anything with prominent romantic storylines, so he insists they go back and fight to take back the kingdom...again (from Cora this time.) 
• Snow is a human being who is already ten times more epic than David and knows it. Much as she'd like to go on a reunion tour with the Disney Princess Brigade, she explains to David that she is tired of fighting. It is then that Snow utters perhaps the most realistic and amazing line of the season: "Maybe we want different things." (More on that in the review).
• Archie goes and lets Emma and Henry know that he's alive, which proves that Regina didn't kill him. Henry's all "Ermahgerd I totes knew it," while I'm just like:

• That night, Belle and Rumpelstiltskin drive into the woods together. Much as the Rumbelle shippers would love it, they do NOT proceed to do what most couples might do in a car in the middle of the woods on a Sunday night (okay, it's probably not Sunday in Storybrooke, but it can be like a Friday for them, because Belle basically owns the library and Rumpelstiltskin basically owns the town, so if they want to not go in the next day, they can not go in the next day. Jefferson can live without his copy of Fifty Shades of Grey for one more day). 
• Just as Rumpelstiltskin crosses the town line and is about to depart on his journey to find Baelfire, Hook pops up and shoots Belle, who isn't fatally wounded- yay! On the other hand, she fell over the boundary, so she's lost her memory- nay! 
• Then a car hits Hook and saves the not-so-happy couple before crashing into the side of the road.

What I Thought:

   Oh, Rumbelle. How I loved thee when you first appeared. It was a fun twist on a classic fairy tale, taking someone who was a beast in a far less cuddly way than his mainstream Disney counterpart and pairing him off with someone who had to believe that people can change not just their manners and their habits, but their cores, their very beings. The couple takes the forefront in this episode again, and unfortunately, it's to the episode's overall detriment.
   When you boil away all of the details, this plot boils down to one we've seen at least twice before (2x04, and Belle's premiere episode in Season 1): Rumpelstiltskin is less than perfect. Belle believes in him and he lets her down. Rumpelstiltskin implies he'll try harder next time, and Belle forgives him. Quite honestly, I'm sick of it. Relationships involve forgiveness, it's true, but they also involve effort, and I feel like that's something Rumpelstiltskin is just refusing to give. This is very much a one-sided relationship, in which Rumpelstiltskin gets to use Belle as an emotional crutch while he continues to use magic, torture others, and seek vengeance despite Belle's politely-worded wishes. What is Belle receiving emotionally? Rumpelstiltskin is very clearly showing that he doesn't want to try and change for Belle, not when there are more important things on the line like making up for past mistakes and inadequacies.
   He says he wants his son, and we're led to believe that he is trying to find Baelfire out of love, but let's take a step back and look at the big picture. Baelfire was transported to our world decades ago. He's likely found himself a new life and put his past behind him. Rumpelstiltskin seeking out his son will reopen plenty of old wounds, especially considering that Rumpelstiltskin was not willing to give up his magic to be happy with his son. But Rumpelstiltskin doesn't seem to care; he wants to find Baelfire because it will satisfy his emotional needs, his desire to make up for abandoning Baelfire years ago. Rumpelstiltskin isn't willing to give anything up in a relationship, romantic or fatherly, and I can't keep routing for him and Belle to succeed as a couple. She deserves someone who is willing to do as much for her as she keeps doing for Rumpelstiltskin, time and time again.
   Now, don't get me wrong: I still like Rumpelstiltskin as a character on a redemption arc, I just don't want to see Belle be dragged down with him. There were two other parts of this episode that I adored, along the lines of the "maturity" chain of thought that I wrote about last week. The first was Snow and David's realization that they have two very different plans for their future. Most marital difficulties are threats from within, not armies and sorceresses from without, so it will be intriguing to see how Snow and David handle their varying opinions in future episodes, especially considering that we've seen them deal with far more physical threats than emotional difficulties. Additionally, Ruby and the dwarves' point was a cynical but valid point about human nature: fear of the unknown is a huge motivational factor for many forms of intolerance.

My Score:

5/10. 

Small subplots weren't enough to redeem the main storyline starring Rumbelle's star-crossed love relationship. 

My Questions:

-Are the seeds of some kind of schism being planted in Storybrooke (perhaps David, Ruby, and the dwarves returning to Storybrooke while Snow, Emma, and Rumpelstiltskin remain in our world?)

-How permanent will Belle's amnesia be? Archie's faked death was resolved rather quickly, but other subplots like August's disappearance and Neal's postcard have been patiently put on a shelf by the writers. Will Belle's newest problem be resolved quickly, or is this her new status quo?

-Is Archie getting Pongo back now, or has Emma already filled out the forms? 

Next Week:

Who is the strange man with such poor driving skills? Also, a mother-daughter reunion and Frankenstein freakiness!

 

(Disclaimer: As always, I've used a lot of gifs, cultural references, memes, and photos. If you or someone you know owns/made one of the gifs/photos/etc., comment below and let me know- I'll take it down, if that's what you wish. I don't claim ownership of any of them, I just browse Tumblr and other sites for ones that fit my blog. Also, I own none of the media I reference. "Once Upon a Time" belongs to ABC, Fifty Shades of Grey belongs to E.L. James and her publisher,"The Big Bang Theory" belongs to CBS, "GLEE" belongs to Fox, "The Road to El Dorado" to Dreamworks, the Harry Potter series to J.K. Rowling, "Sherlock" to the BBC and Moffat, etc., etc...I own nothing. This blog is for entertainment purposes only!)