What Happened:
The Fairytale Land (the Past)
- Hook is a total master of disguise. Using his Cloak of Hiddenness, he manages to break into Belle's cell, where Regina is keeping her. He asks Belle is she knows how to Rumpelstiltskin, but soon learns she's about as helpful as a Blue-Ray disc in the Nineties.
- Regina shows up looking like a stylish Fifties fashion designer (I mean, seriously, THAT HAIR) and wants to know why Hook is messing with her prisoner. When she learns of his desire to kill Rumpelstiltskin, she decides to offer him a deal: Kill her mother, Cora (so that she doesn't get taken to Storybrooke when Regina casts the curse) and Regina will help her kill Rumpelstiltskin.
Hook:
"Meh, Les Miserables doesn't come out for a month, I got time to kill...I'm in."
Regina:
- So then Hook goes to Wonderland, where apparently Cora has taken up residence as the Queen of Hearts. We don't really find out why, but she was disguising her face and voice. Whatevs.
- Hook tries to steal Cora's heart using a magic something-or-other given to him by Regina. Unfortunately, it doesn't work. Cora stops him and steals Hook's heart. When she learns what he was doing, she has him do something for her, instead.
- Hook lugs Cora back to the main Fairytale Land, where he plops her in a coffin and pretends she's dead. Regina buys it, and actually seems quite saddened: apparently she only wanted Cora dead because she still loved her, despite everything Cora had done to her. She didn't want Cora to hold her back, because- as Cora once told Regina- "love is weakness."
- Later, we discover how Mulan, Aurora, Philip, Cora, and Hook were protected from the curse: Cora cast a protective spell over herself and Hook, along with a large portion of the Fairytale Land that they were standing in. Everyone there was protected from the curse. It looked a lot like the defensive charms from the Battle of Hogwarts, but I digress.
The Fairytale Land AND Storybrooke (present) - (these two are far too tied together this week to separate...)
- Within Gold's shop, David is snoozing and Henry is reading to him. Regina thinks it's sweet, even though we all know she's vomiting on the inside.
- Gold and Regina discuss the fact that while Emma and Snow MIGHT be the ones to make it out of the portal, it's far more likely Cora will win. In the name of practicality, the two schemers decide to pull a heist!
Is it too soon to make a joke regarding who could have helped them? Technically he's been dead twenty-eight years, sooooooo...?
- Back in the Fairytale Land, the Disney Princess Brigade gets to Rumpelstiltskin's cell. Unfortunately for them, they don't find the ink-- only a piece of paper with Emma's name written on it over, and over, and over again...it's, like, TOTALLY "Criminal Minds: European Folklore."
- Suddenly Aurora traps them in their cell! Has she betrayed them all? Is she jealous that Mulan got a sundial patent and didn't split the reward with her? No, nothing nearly so melodramatic, it's just Cora and Hook using her disembodied heart to possess her.
- Cora and Hook snatch the compass back. Hook takes a moment to let Emma know, in no uncertain terms, that they are never, ever, EVER getting back together. She could care less. The shippers should care less, but we do. We DO care. Many a "Captain Swan" fan will spend the month of December aching for the Romance of the Year to pick up again.
Yes, Leah Michelle...Yes, we have.
- Regina and Gold cackle and tiptoe up to the Magic Well in the Storybrooke Woods (remember the one from last year's finale? The one that Gold poured the True Love Potion into in order to bring magic back to Storybrooke?) Together, they dump the magic they stole from the fairy-dust mines into the well via a lightning-bolt, booger-colored so that we know it's bad.
- Henry and Ruby show up, horrified at what Regina has done. Regina and Gold assure them that it's a necessary and realistic defense; Cora will most likely defeat Emma and Snow, thus allowing herself to enter Storybrooke and hurt Henry. The kid is less than understanding.
- In the Fairytale Land, Mulan further proves her intelligence by locating the ink bottle. It's empty, unfortunately. Snow then realizes that the ink is within the paper, written a thousand times as Emma's name. She blows the words off the scroll of Creeper Paper and into the bars, thus releasing them.
- The Disney Princess Brigade arrives to the lake where Hook and Cora were about to jump into a portal to Storybrooke. They have a REALLY, uber-intense battle with lots of "Girl, please" and "This place about to" moments, it's really quite exciting. (Oh, and Hook and Emma have more eyesex. LOTS more. That's probably the real reason Cora is angry, because she thinks Emma is stealin' "her man.")
- Eventually, Mulan gets Aurora's heart back and goes off to free her. Cora tries to grab Emma's heart, but it won't work- a big blast of energy comes out of Emma's heart and knocks Cora down.
Emma has the Power of Heart!
- Emma and Snow make it back to Storybrooke safely, thanks to Regina deciding to trust Henry that Good would win and Emma and Snow would be the ones to come through the portal, resulting in a vastly-painful spell in which Regina sucked up the evil booger-colored lightning bolt so that Snow and Emma survived the trip home.
- Henry is totally ungrateful, but luckily Emma has better manners. Snow kisses David and wakes him up, Henry FINALLY thanks Regina before going off to get dinner with Emma, and Regina is very sad because Gold rubs the whole "There goes your son, off to look up to another woman as his mother figure" thing in her face. In the Fairytale Land, Mulan and Aurora go off to look for the way to restore Philip.
- Off in the distance, Hook and Cora sail up to Storybrooke harbor in a freaking PIRATE SHIP; apparently they had a magic bean left over from the Giant's house that allowed them to navigate the portal and arrive in Storybrooke. They roll up, all ready to conquer, like, you just KNOW they're jamming to Ke$ha and getting ready to take over Storybrooke. And the cool thing is...I almost found myself rooting for 'em.
What I Thought:
I loved the ending. I freaking LOVED the ending. I just cannot...I mean, that's so cool. That is SOOOOOO cool, and you all know it. But, ah... *ahem* I suppose I should try and reclaim a little bit of professionalism for the "review" portion of this post.
The best part of this episode was the ending. That's not to say the rest was bad, because it wasn't. It was decent stuff. Nothing too surprising, simply because all signs had been pointing to this, but it was still enjoyable. Snow and Emma got home, Cora and Hook were defeated for now, Regina managed to get a little bit farther in her relationship to Henry...not too surprising.
The ending, on the other hand, blew me out of the water, almost literally. This is something that has clearly been being built towards all season, and it had to happen in the way that it did. Emma and Snow have been battling Cora and Hook all season long, but we always kind of knew they'd win. Because, as Henry kept insisting, "Good always wins." That might not be the case for much longer. Cora, who clearly is a more powerful mage than Regina and possibly Gold, has arrived in Storybrooke. The very thing Regina and Gold were afraid of is occurring before our very eyes, right after multiple episodes of people telling us how bad this would be if it came to pass. With Cora in power, arriving in Storybrooke, I'm really looking forward to a lot of Fairytale Land conventions being challenged. Love might not conquer all, because Cora's launching an attack that she can, and likely will, win.
I think we're looking ahead to a Storybrooke at war. In a war, people tend to change and grow up, and now always for the better. Henry might have to adjust his naivete a bit over the second half of the season, starting in January. Maybe things will be less black and white, now that we're back in our world. Surely with Neal on his way and Emma's possible romantic feelings for Hook, that's something that's got potential romantically as well as morally. Regina clearly wants to remain a presence in Henry's life, which may not happen with Emma back in the picture. So what does she do-- fight Emma to be in Henry's life again? Will Emma give in, or try to keep Henry for herself? I think we're going to be seeing a lot of grey in the second half of this season, and Good might not always win in every decision that will be made...
My Score: 7/10. A somewhat predictable plot was redeemed by an exciting lead into the rest of the season.
My Predictions for The Show's Return:
-Emma will try to leave Storybrooke to be with Neal.
-Hook will develop feelings for Emma, but she won't visibly reciprocate (if she does eventually admit to them, it won't be until the Season Finale).
-Henry will learn magic from Regina.
-Belle will break things off with Gold, so that Hook can't use her against him. It'll work about as well as it did for Spider-Man and Mary Jane.
-We won't hear from August, Mulan, or Aurora for awhile...
-...but we'll get some new "modernizations" of fairy tale characters who have been in Storybrooke this whole time, just in the background (I know there were rumors of Ariel, Aladdin, and Jafar for this season, along with Wizards of Oz characters. Of course, the rumors started this past summer, so they might not be accurate, but we can only hope!)
(Disclaimer: As always, I've used a lot of gifs,
cultural references, memes, and photos. If you or someone you know owns/made one
of the gifs/photos/etc., comment below and let me know- I'll take it down, if
that's what you wish. I don't claim ownership of any of them, I just browse
Tumblr and other sites for ones that fit my blog. Also, I own none of the media
I reference. "Once Upon a Time" belongs to ABC, Ke$ha songs belong to Ke$ha, "Glee" belongs to Fox, God knows who "Captain Planet" belongs to, etc., etc...I own
nothing.)
